Behavior Managment

Presenter: Joseph Buonadonna, Ph.D.
View the webinar’s corresponding slide presentation here
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Dr. Buonadonna discussed the difference between problematic behaviors versus annoying behaviors and developmentally appropriate behaviors.  He also talked about behavior management plans between parent and child.  Dr. Buonadonna gave practical techniques to create behavior modification and stressed the need for being calm, consistent and patient.


  1. NJCTS says:

    What will my other kids think if I start rewarding my one child for things they always do right?

    • Dr.Buonadonna says:

      It’s been my experience that children are able to accept different rules in different circumstances or for different individuals. This is clear when they go from one classroom to another or one teacher to another. Each has their own rules and children learn that the rules are different in different settings. They also learn that there are children in the classroom who have certain behaviors or rules that are specific to them. In your family I would expect that each of your children would want to be acknowledged for their good behavior and would accept consequences for misbehavior but the rules don’t have to be the same for each child.

  2. NJCTS says:

    Do the consequences have to be the same for all of my kids?

    • Dr.Buonadonna says:

      No. Again I would suggest that each child be treated differently. If one child has a specific behavior that is problematic but another doesn’t I wouldn’t have the same consequences or rewards. Each has to be meaningful to the individual child. And rules should only exist when there’s a problem and I need to make one. Otherwise it is not necessary to intervene.

  3. NJCTS says:

    How long should consequences last?

    • Dr.Buonadonna says:

      Whenever possible consequences should be immediate and as short as is effective. Preferably never more then one day. The reason for this is that as soon as the consequences over a child has the opportunity again to practice the appropriate behavior. So the sooner, the better.

  4. NJCTS says:

    Is it necessary to reward my child for everything? What about them doing things I think they should do just because they’re part of the family?

    • Dr.Buonadonna says:

      It is certainly not necessary to read to reward a child for everything good that they do. However acknowledgement good behavior is always encouraged. Keep in mind that we only implement behavioral interventions and behavior plans when and if behavior becomes a problem. If children are routinely doing good things then leave well enough alone. “If it ain’t broken don’t fix it!”

  5. NJCTS says:

    What if my spouse and I don’t agree?

    • Dr.Buonadonna says:

      As parents we are all individuals and have different principles and tolerance levels, so it is important to respect our spouses positions when they don’t agree with ours. This being said it is not necessary that we absolutely agree on everything but we must come to a compromise and not sabotage our partners efforts. This means that it is important to establish rules that we can both be comfortable supporting consistently. If one party undermines the efforts of the other the success of a behavior management plan is questionable without undue tension.

  6. NJCTS says:

    I can I PRE-negotiate problem behaviors if I don’t know what the problem is going to be?

    • Dr.Buonadonna says:

      The good news here is that a problem is not a problem until it becomes a problem. So it is important to be alert and respond promptly when a problem behavior begins to develop. And soon as you see signs of concerning behavior be sure to draw attention to the behavior that is not acceptable and clearly express to your child what your expectations are. If the problem is not resolved then it may be necessary to implement a more formal behavior plan with rules, rewards and consequences.