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The enemy has been defeated: Me 1, Anxiety 0

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Hello everyone. I haven’t posted for almost a week and a half. Our internet went out because our cable line, the whole line, was dead. So, we have a temporary line and we have it back. So, now I’m able to post on Twitch and Jerk daily once again and I can post on here weekly.

My tics, still, have only happened when I have gotten agitated. The problem with that is when I get agitated, my tics seem to try and make me hurt myself — like pinching, hitting head against something, etc. It has gone on and off. I haven’t been to the doctor in forever. My moms are setting up an appointment.

I have so much to tell my social anxiety therapist. She is so kind, and she has helped me so much. Last night, at Dungeons and Dragons, I did something that I thought I’d never do. Starting a conversation. But, I didn’t just start a conversation. I started three conversations with the same person.

To be honest, it was with a guy I really like. Now, my social anxiety is usually so bad that I can’t talk to any men — especially with guys I have a crush on. Thanks to my best friend, and my courage, I was able to talk to him and act myself around him in a room full of people I didn’t know. That would usually take me weeks to do. I am very proud of myself of doing that.

I feel like I am winning the battle between me and my anxiety — slowly, but surely. I have come this far, and I won’t quit now. With you guys’ support, my friends and family’s help, and my will, I will make it through.

I haven’t written my book in a while. I feel really bad about that, but I have been so busy that I have forgotten about it. But, once I have the time, I will edit what I have so far and try my best to push myself to write some more.

The great thing is that I’m out of my depressed state. Since the beginning of February, I’ve learned to push myself to be more positive in my mind. I haven’t been sad or depressed for a while now.

Also, many of you know this, but I’m hoping to go to the 2012 Biennial National Tourette Syndrome Association Conference in Virginia. I know I keep talking about it, but I’m just so excited that I might be able to go. I hope to see a lot of you there if you are able to go. So many can’t go because of money. I completely understand that. That’s why I keep saying I might be able to go. So, overall, everything has been going great!

Question of the week: How many of you with anxiety have done something that made you feel like you conquered your anxiety? Hope you all have a magnificent week! :)

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RowenaM

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