Last night the guy I have been going on dates with asked me if I would like to go out with him officially. I said yes! :)
So now I can say that we’re officially going out and that for now I am no longer single. I like so much about him. I really like how open he is with me and that he is not afraid to show me who he truly is. I also really like his personality in general and how he is a really great conversationalist.
We always have something to talk about and it’s always engaging and thought provoking to be around him. I like that he wants to spend time getting to know me and he really seems to like me. He gives me so many complements and tells me how cute I am, how much he likes spending time with me, and how happy he is that he met me.
Today he opened up to me about some things that were more on the personal side, and even though I was hesitant to, I opened up to him more too. I told me that I have sensory issues and OCD traits. He seemed really OK with it and didn’t seem to think much of it at all. It didn’t seem to affect how he feels about me and after I told him that he asked me to get ice cream later tonight and hang out more.
This gives me more confidence that if I told him about my tics, it wouldn’t affect how he feels about me either. There is still that nagging thought in the back of my head though, that fear that he will not accept me. I know it’s just the fear that has been instilled in me by my parents that is making me feel this way. I know intellectually that he probably won’t reject me because of my tics. The fear and the emotion is so real though. I think at this point I just have to take a leap of faith and plunge off the diving board. I think the sooner I make the leap, the easier it will be to be myself around him.
I’m not sure when exactly i’m going to take that leap and tell him, but I am hoping I will have the courage to do it soon, maybe even tonight when we get ice cream together. I plan on telling him in a very casual way and not making a big deal about it. I’ll keep you guys updated on what I decide to do! Please wish me luck! :)