This is the essay I submitted to the NJ Center for Tourette Syndrome & Associated Disorders (NJCTS) for their 2017 Youth Scholarship Award contest.
Tim Howard, an amazing athlete playing Premier Soccer and two-time representative in the World cup. He defines himself as a player who happens to have Tourette. We have this in common. No, I am not a professional soccer player, but I am a successful student, passionate person, and someone who has compassion for everyone beyond belief, who happens to have Tourette. Many view my Tourette as a disability. I, on the other hand strongly believe it is to my advantage. The person who I see in the mirror everyday is not the once shy kid who was afraid to speak out. I am someone who is not afraid to advocate or my condition, someone who smiles at the sight of a challenge, someone whose ambition is so high that whatever my life has to throw at me I can easily pick myself up, dust off my shoulder and trek forward. I already have one challenge completed: not let my Tourette control me.
I was diagnosed with TS at seven years old, and Howard was one of many who my dad told me about who was very successful in various fields of life that had Tourette. It was great to have these examples when I was forced to resolve awkward questions from peers and the occasional bullying in school. Even teachers would make comments about the unusual things I would do in the classroom. I was very shy about my tics and never spoke out to advocate for my condition. As I look back to who I was then, and who I became today I realized that the NJCTS Tim Howard Leadership Academy changed me. Those three weekends showed me that I don’t have to hide, and I should be proud of who I am.
During my first year at the Academy, my confidence boosted tremendously. I was able to talk about my tics in a light-hearted fashion and I also started to feel a sense of pride about having Tourette. I no longer view Tourette as a disability because it makes me who I am today. Throughout the academy many professionals in the medical field helped me to improve myself with the condition I have. With this new information, I was able to teach important lessons and advocate for others at the end of my third year. The coaches and others who attended the academy made me a better person today by teaching me how to advocate for myself. They shared stories with me in meetings which allowed me to share my story, thus shaping me into the person who is not afraid to speak out and advocate for our “advantage”. The Tim Howard Leadership Academy is near and dear to my heart. This academy was the first time I was able to express my true self in front of newly made friends, and not to be embarrassed about my condition. It was a great opportunity to let out my inner “Noah” without the fear of rejection and abnormalcy to people who go through similar situations in their life.
I truly believe that my Tourette has guided me to become a person who not only could defy expectations but to accomplish triumphs I never expected to complete. Who would have thought a kid with a so-called “disability” could get into every school they applied to and have so many options to better their future. I would encourage people with Tourette or other “advantages” to speak out, to let the world know that we can do anything we set our mind to. Yes it might be a struggle, but that just means we will work 10 times harder than an average person. Whatever my future is – a doctor, a lawyer, a teacher – I know that with my little buddy by my side (Tourette) we can defy the odds and do anything. Now I might not be the greatest athlete or the most brilliant student but I am who I am. The condition called Tourette will be a part of me for my entire life but it will not be a limitation. I cannot control how people view me. can only control how I view myself.