{"id":3871,"date":"2014-09-22T07:30:01","date_gmt":"2014-09-22T11:30:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/njcts.org\/tsparents\/?p=3871"},"modified":"2014-09-22T07:30:01","modified_gmt":"2014-09-22T11:30:01","slug":"ways-to-support-a-friend-with-tourette-part-3-reassurance-is-calming","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/njcts.org\/tsparents\/ways-to-support-a-friend-with-tourette-part-3-reassurance-is-calming\/","title":{"rendered":"Ways to Support a Friend with Tourette, Part 3: Reassurance is calming"},"content":{"rendered":"

Tourette Syndrome is a two-sided coin. One side is that of the individual with the disorder, the point of view from which he sees the world. Then there\u2019s the other side, the perspective of all those who are close to that individual.<\/p>\n

Tourette can be an awkward thing to talk about. It\u2019s gotten easier for me as the years go by, but when I was younger, it was the last thing I wanted to admit to myself, let alone other people. And yet, sometimes it\u2019s just the elephant in the room, something you can\u2019t\u00a0just ignore. As a friend, it\u2019s important to know how to address your friend\u2019s Tourette delicately\u00a0and<\/em>\u00a0honestly. It can strengthen your friendship, and it can build your friend like little else can.<\/p>\n

Here is the third of 6 ways to love on your friends with the neurological disorder,\u00a0Tourette Syndrome (TS)<\/a><\/strong>,\u00a0as told by someoneone with Tourette:<\/p>\n

\"6Waystosupportyourfriendwithts\"<\/a><\/p>\n

If You\u2019re Close to Someone with Tourette\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Physicalreassurance\"<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

Now, I mean this in a non-creepy way. As with all physical touch, it needs to be administered in response to the situation and the personal preferences of your friend.<\/p>\n

For example, If you\u2019re two guys hanging out at a sports bar, and your friend has a ticcing fit, it\u2019s probably a bad idea to gently put your hand on his. There\u2019s a good chance he\u2019ll either disown\u00a0you\u00a0or deck you. Also, if your friend is of the opposite sex, you want to make sure you\u2019re not sending unwanted signals about the relationship. Still, physical contact, when wisely given, can be subtle and encouraging.<\/p>\n

\"Anxiety<\/a>In my article on\u00a0anxiety attacks<\/a><\/strong>, I talk about how physical touch has been scientifically proven to lower stress. Remember that most tics worsen with anxiety. This means that simply putting your hand on your friend\u2019s shoulder can wordlessly send the message that you\u2019re there for her. Clapping your buddy kindly on the shoulder can be a manly way of showing encouragement. If the situation is appropriate, a hug can work miracles.<\/p>\n

A physical signal of reassurance is great not only because it can help lower stress, but also because it\u2019s a way of saying you\u2019re there for your friend without having to announce it to everyone in the room. It means you\u2019ve got her back, and you know she\u2019s going through a hard time.<\/p>\n

Obviously, it would be weird if some of my friends did this to me, but my husband and my\u00a0mom have something they do when we\u2019re in public and they can sense my tics getting worse. They\u2019ll gently take my hand and just lightly rub the top of my hand or wrist. It\u2019s not attention grabbing because we\u2019re obviously family, and it\u2019s a small enough motion to not be noticed by many people. And yet, the physical stimulation, combined with their encouragement, can really help when my tics are having a field day during church.<\/p>\n

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