God, grant me the serenity to accept the tics I cannot change, change the tics I can, and have the wisdom to know the difference.
Yup, just another week of tics and noises, and yes, after hearing them over and over, I get a wee bit exhausted.
CONFESSION TIME: Dearest vocal tics, I am sorry for finding you annoying. I wish I didn’t feel that way. There’s a mom who I read about over on some Facebook TS page who just thinks all your clicks and throat clears are awesome. “They are just so adorable,” she squeals. Um, sorry, I don’t. Why? Because I want to hear my kid tell me a story he is writing about the Magic Egg without having his sentences disjointed every other second with this squelched honking sound.
CONFESSION TIME TO ANYONE READING WHO HAS TS: I must come off like a total boob. To be fair, let me tell you that if you hang out with me enough, you’ll get tired of my crazy nonstop talking, my annoying “vintage” clothing that has me often looking like a polyester Minnie Pearl, and my butt that seems to be getting bigger with each passing day.
CONFESSION TIME FOR ME: I know that I am doing a great job with my boy. Why? He still so happy and thriving. Tourette is just one more opportunity for me to focus on what is truly important — the soul of my child. The heart of my family. When I get distracted about noises, I only need to remember my Friday wine companion, Ellen (above) who, despite being in an auto accident when she was 18 and living life from a chair, is one of the most kick-butt human beings I know. She teaches at our local Cal State. She bowls, surfs, swims and posed for Hugh Heffner ( a full spread… oh my) back in the day. She doesn’t let a few things like, oh, walking, stop her.
TAKEAWAY: To pretend something doesn’t bug you just to look better to other people who might judge you for having negative feelings… that’s lame. It’s fine to vent. But here’s my personal conviction: Don’t just vent and run. (Have you ever been around someone who farted and left the room? Not pleasant.) Release and then clear the air! (In the cases of gas and tics.)
Speak your thoughts but have a plan for restoration — if not for the tics — for you. How are you going to take care of yourself so that maybe the noises don’t bug you so much? How are you going to discipline your child, tics or not, so that they grow up to be healthy members of society? Are you willing to accept that, twitches or not, your kid might have amazing gifts and change the world anyway?
Just a few random thoughts.
Love your take on the Serenity Prayer. It’s something we all can pray!
Vent and run! Love it! Your few random thoughts brighten the day as always!
HI Charlotte and Trudy and Marc – I was worried later I would offend someone with this post. Like somehow I was making fun of someone’s disability and that is far from the case. I actually can’t stand how much I love my kids which is why I find the noises distracting. That all said, it’s time to really work on acceptance so they are not mutually exclusive. Love my kid, love the tics I can’t change. That is the plan. (Who is with me or at least wants to start drinking?)
A drink sounds like a great idea. :) But yes, you’re right, acceptance is the key. We as TS parents spend so much time trying to get OTHERS to accept our kids for who they are that we often forget to do that ourselves sometimes.
I’m with the ladies. I couldn’t agree more. I find myself tryign to stop getting so upset over what I can’t control — my son’s tics — too often. I need to embrace him and them better, and only then can I be better at helping him through his life.
I second that. Speaks perfectly to my situation. Labor of love!
This is exactely what I needed to read today!!!!