Today I discovered something more about myself, something I might know about but was unaware of. In school, I am studying to work with little children, and we had a course called “expression” that requires 4 hours of knitting.\u00a0A couple of times, some teachers passed by to see how we were, well, knitting.<\/p>\n
After a while, I started to notice that every time a teacher was checking my work, I started working faster and better in hopes that a teacher would ask how I’m doing or give some (positive) feedback.\u00a0I was unaware of it before. And sadly, again they didn’t ask how I was feeling or give any feedback at all.<\/p>\n
Although I’m a bit shy, I need a teacher who gives me feedback a lot and who asks if I’m feeling fine — a teacher that shows some more interest in me. Sadly, most of the students in my class are more social than I am. They talk faster, louder and more, thus automatically getting some attention.<\/p>\n
I could use some more attention from teachers. Just asking how I’m feeling gives me an instant boost, which allows me to concentrate better and motivates me more.\u00a0But today I became aware that — actually, it was not only today — I start knitting (or working) faster and better when teachers come and check on me. I’m doing this my entire life, already!<\/p>\n
For my whole life, I’ve tried to get some attention in class from teachers. I try to work harder and better when I notice there is a chance to get a more personal contact, especially when working in smaller groups. Or I pimp my school agenda with pictures and cool drawings, just in the hope a teacher would say, “Hey, that’s a cool agenda!” But no.<\/p>\n
They do these things with other students in class. Sometimes I just think they are scared of me — scared to say something wrong, that I would eat them since I’m a scary monster. And that makes me feel sad and frustrated, especially since my parents and I talk about this with the school. They just seem to keep forgetting it.<\/p>\n
It’s a battle I have had for my entire school career — a battle I would like to stop and forget when going to school. No more battling for some attention — just being a student like all the others that don’t struggle with asking some attention.<\/p>\n
I hope some day teachers will start doing this without me asking, talking and having meetings with my parents. However, I’m giving up this hope. Maybe I’m just a scary monster with a happy life outside those school buildings.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Today I discovered something more about myself, something I might know about but was unaware of. In school, I am studying to work with little children, and we had a course called “expression” that requires 4 hours of knitting.\u00a0A couple… Continue Reading