Essential Connections: Navigating a Path to College Success

0:04 Good evening and welcome. 0:06 Thank you so much for joining us for tonight’s webinar College Essentials Navigating Your Path to Success presented by Dr. Colleen Dally-Martinez. 0:15 My name is Katie Delaney, and I’m the family and Medical Outreach Coordinator for the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome. I will be your facilitator for this evening. 0:25 Before I introduce our presenter, I want to go over some housekeeping notes. 0:28 The audience is muted. 0:29 If you are attending the live webinar, questions can be submitted in the questions box at the bottom of your screen. 0:35 During the live Q &A, the audience will gain access to and mute themselves. 0:39 We will stop recording right before this. 0:43 At the top right of your screen, you’ll see a paperclip icon. 0:46 There, you’ll be able to find a copy of the slides and upcoming events. 0:50 For those viewing the webinar recording, if you have any questions, you can post them in the chat box to the left of your screen. 0:57 presenter will answer those questions on our webinar blog located on our website njcts.org under the programs tab. This blog will be monitored until Tuesday, November 26th. 1:07 Any personal information will not be included in this post. Excuse me. 1:13 The New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome and Associated Disorders, its directors and employees assume no responsibility for the accuracy, completeness, objectivity, or usefulness of information presented on our website. 1:26 We do endorse any recommendation or opinion made by any member or physician, nor do we advocate any treatment. You are responsible for your own medical decisions. Sorry. 1:37 Now, it is my pleasure to introduce our speaker this evening, Dr. Colleen Daly Martinez. Dr. 1:41 Martinez is a licensed clinical social worker and a registered play therapist supervisor with 30 years of experience working with children and their families. 1:50 She’s an assistant professor of social work at Ramapo College of New Jersey. 1:56 As a faculty member, she has been an advisor to hundreds of college students. 2:02 In her private practice, she provides training, supervision, and consultation to individuals, agencies, and schools to ensure that children and their families receive high quality services. 2:11 Most importantly, she is the mom of a teenager who is currently in their first semester of college. Dr. Martinez, the floor is all yours. Thank you so much. 2:22 Hi there, I’d like to thank first the New Jersey Center for Tourette Syndrome and Associated Disorders and Katie for inviting me here to talk with you tonight and thank you so much for making the time to be here with us. 2:35 I understand that we have parents, family members, and professionals who work with young people here today. 2:40 I’m not sure if we have any current or future college students but if you think your student would benefit I hope you’ll share the recording with them afterward. 2:49 I will interchangeably be speaking to students directly and to support people tonight. 2:54 So you’re aware my presentation is not meant to be specific to neurotypical or neurodivergent students, commuter students or students who live on campus. 3:04 My hope is that this time together will be helpful in some way to anyone, any current or future college student and the adults that support them. 3:14 I wanted to share a little bit about me so that you understand my perspective as I present to you tonight. 3:19 So I was a first generation college student, meaning that neither of my parents went to college. 3:24 So I didn’t have the benefit of that generational wisdom when I attended college in the 90s. 3:31 What I mean by that is that my parents weren’t able to give me informed and experienced guidance on navigating college. 3:37 I was pretty much figuring things out on my own. I’m also a mental health professional. 3:43 As a licensed clinical social worker, I’ve been working with young people and their families for about 30 years, mostly around improving relationships to promote wellness and to recover from trauma. 3:54 I also worked as a related service provider for seven years in the school district. 3:59 In that position, I worked closely with students, teachers, administrators, and child study teams. 4:05 I’m a faculty member and advisor. 4:06 I’ve been teaching college students for over 20 years. 4:09 At Ramapo College of New Jersey, I teach and I provide guidance to college students who are majoring in social work. 4:15 Most importantly to me, I’m a mom of a teenager who’s right now finishing up her first semester at college. 4:22 I created this presentation because if you didn’t go to college yourself, you might not know what to expect for your student. 4:29 And even if you did, things at college might be very different from when you were there. 4:33 There might be some different challenges and there might be more supports available that I think you might want to know about. 4:40 In our time together, I’m going to review some research on the challenges of college and resilience at college, and then share some tips and suggestions, a few resources, and then have time to answer any questions that you might have. 4:54 That being said, please let me know throughout our time together if questions come up. 4:58 I’m happy to hear them as we move along or at the end. 5:02 I want you to leave here tonight having information and feeling more prepared to support your student as they transition to college. 5:12 So, in preparation for today, I reviewed some of the research on the challenges faced when transitioning to college, and these are just a selection of the many studies I found. 5:24 As we can see, students face a lot when they’re going to college. 5:27 Change in routines, separation from familiar people, adjustment to new people and places, new academic expectations, new financial stressors. 5:38 I also want to highlight that there’s a much greater emphasis on independence in college. 5:44 While parents and caregivers tend to be heavily involved in general education and special education through emails, parent-teacher meetings, back-to-school nights, 504 plans, and IEPs in K-12 education, the expectation at the college level is that parents and caregivers are not going to be involved and that students are going to have to grow in their independence and self-advocacy skills. 6:10 Even when students require disability-related accommodations, students are the point person for the management of their education. 6:18 In fact, due to federal privacy laws, college staff and faculty can’t engage with parents about their students. 6:27 So with all of the change and new pressures that students face as they transition to college, they might struggle. 6:34 Some studies find that anxiety and depression increase the summer before college starts and continues through the spring semester. 6:42 Depression is the number one diagnosis on college campuses. 6:47 This impacts students’ academics, their relationships, their quality of life, sometimes even continuing into adulthood. 6:55 College students have higher level of depression than other people their age, and while suicide rates of college students are lower than the general public, unfortunately those rates are increasing. 7:07 Colleges and universities are more diverse with more first-generation, more racial, ethnic, and sexual minority students, and minority students experience more stressors, more difficulty adjusting, and more dropout than white middle-class students. 7:24 Female students have higher risk of mental health diagnoses than males. 7:31 For this In this section, I looked at research on resilience. 7:35 Studies I found are pretty consistent in their findings. 7:38 Adequacy of social support is directly related to well-being in college. 7:44 Social support is very important. 7:47 Social support decreases psychological symptoms. 7:50 Social support decreases depression, loneliness, and even health issues. 7:56 Social support improves well-being, which in turn improves student retention, meaning that students are less likely to drop out if they have social support. 8:07 Social support decreases the effect of stress on well-being. 8:12 Social support can be categorized as support from friends, from romantic partners, and from family members. 8:21 Self-esteem also seems to be important in resilience, the belief that they’re people of worth and that they have a sense of respect for themselves. 8:29 Students with low self-esteem may be more sensitive to rejection, and so therefore they might be more likely to avoid social contact, which then impacts their social support, which then increases depression. So you see the pattern here. 8:43 Social support is a positive tie through all of these issues. School belonging also is important in resilience. 8:51 Feeling accepted, connected, and included, and self-compassion also seems to be important. 8:58 So what do we mean by self-compassion? Well, self-kindness. 9:02 Also focusing on identifying common humanity, mindful awareness of emotions, and not avoiding or not over-identifying with failure or suffering. 9:14 I’ll talk more about that later when I share some suggestions and tips. 9:21 So if we’re going to talk about navigating a path to college success, I think it’s important for us to talk about how we measure success. 9:30 Often when we think about college success, we think about academic achievement, earning a certain GPA or completing a certain major or graduating a certain amount of time as measures of success or maybe not dropping out. 9:44 It’s important to note that not everyone thinks about success in the same way. 9:48 and I think it could be valuable, really important for us to consider other indicators of success. 9:54 For example, in a Facebook group for mothers that are also college professors that I’m in, somebody asked the question, and they asked members to fill in these blanks. 10:06 The question was, I want my child to grow up and be blank and blank. 10:12 And I wonder how you would complete that sentence. 10:15 I want my child to grow up and be blank and blank. 10:19 So in this group, college professor Mothers said that I want my child to grow up and be happy, healthy, kind, enthusiastic, self-sufficient, hardworking, responsible, safe, relaxed, who they are and what they want to be. 10:39 The most common response that college professor Mothers gave was when I want my child to grow up and be kind and happy. 10:50 So as we consider how we measure measure success, I would strongly encourage you to have a balanced view and also to communicate these priorities to your student. 11:00 While of course, we all want our students to achieve academically and to complete a meaningful major, we should also consider happiness, wellness, mental health, developing and growing in their independence skills, safety, exploration of themselves and their interests. Those are also measures of success. 11:21 Also consider progress toward ultimate goals as success. 11:26 One thing I really hope that you take away from this conversation today is that navigating the path to college success is a process, it’s a journey, and it takes time. So now we get to the point where I’d like to share some tips and suggestions. 11:43 First, I want to highlight that there is not one path to success. 11:47 There are many, and the path that your student takes may have twists and turns and may not look like someone else’s path, and that is okay. 11:57 For example, you should know that 80% of college students change their major at some point. 12:02 And on average, college students change their major three times. 12:06 So it’s important to not look at those twists and turns as a problem. 12:12 so that theme of my tips and suggestions, most of them, most of them fit into this theme of connection. 12:20 Connect, connect, connect. 12:23 Based upon what I’ve seen, what I’ve experienced, and what I’ve read, I’m going to suggest that connection is the way to navigate a path to college success. 12:35 So first, it’s important for college students to connect with peers. 12:40 Connecting with peers allows students to not be lonely, to develop friendships, to develop community and potential social support. 12:49 And we know that social support is so important in resilience during this challenging time. 12:54 Joining clubs and groups is one way to find their people, to engage with others who have shared interests, to make new friends and develop new interests and to build community. 13:06 Connecting with peers could look like showing up at advertised events and club meetings, but it could also be just smiling at people as you walk down the hall or chatting with people in line at the cafeteria or chatting with classmates before class starts. 13:21 Smiling, having an open stance, providing eye contact, appearing interested. All of these send the message that you’re open to connection. 13:29 For those who are more shy or slow to warm, this can be challenging. 13:33 But it’s important to remember that others are also looking to make friends and to connect too. 13:38 It’s also important to continue to connect with existing friends. 13:42 If the student or their friends live away at college, it might look different, but staying in touch by text, by phone, and even sending each other mail is a good way to maintain those connections and that support. 13:55 Making plans to get together in person, whether it’s on weekends or holidays or breaks, it’s another way to maintain that connection with your existing friends. 14:07 So it’s also very important for students to seek out connection with their faculty members and their professors. 14:15 While students are going to spend time with their professors in class, of course, this is definitely not the only way to connect, and it’s typically not enough for developing a personal one-to-one connection. 14:26 So all family members hold office hours where they’re specifically making themselves available to meet with students. 14:33 These meetings could be to discuss class assignments or to get extra help but could also be just to get to know each other and to receive mentoring. 14:44 Faculty members typically enjoy supporting students, getting to know them and giving them advice on their major or their future career. 14:52 It’s why we become teachers because we love to have that impact on our students. 14:57 Office hours are typically written on the course syllabus and I promise you students are not bothering professors when they show up. 15:05 Professors appreciate enthusiasm from their students and will often invest more energy into students who demonstrate their interest by showing up in this way. 15:15 Students who go to professor’s office hours might be more likely to hear about internships and opportunities for scholarships because the professor really gets to know them and remembers them when opportunities arise. 15:26 When students meet with professors in this one-to-one It also allows the student to feel more comfortable with the professor and more supported by the professor. 15:35 So if there are problems or challenges throughout the semester that might make the student more comfortable going back and asking for help. 15:44 But you don’t have to wait for office hours to connect with your professor. 15:48 So I’ve taught thousands of students at this point in my career and remembering students names is often a challenge. 15:55 That being said there’s one that I will remember their name forever, this student emailed me at the beginning of the semester before classes even started. 16:04 They sent me an email to introduce themselves and to tell me how and why they were excited to meet me and join my class. 16:11 I like to think that I develop good relationships with all of my students because I do put in that effort, but student will always stand out in my memory so that when they request my time, when they request advice, when they request letters of recommendation and such, they’re always going to be fresh in my mind. 16:28 I strongly encourage students to email their new professors at the beginning of the semester. 16:32 They can introduce themselves, share some enthusiasm about the course or the professor, and they’re already beginning to develop a deeper connection with the professor who’s a potential source of support in the future. 16:44 So another important reason to email professors is when a student is eligible to receive disability accommodations. 16:51 So schools may have different policies and practices, but it seems to me pretty typical that a form letter is sent by accessibility services to professors with the students accommodations at the beginning of a semester. 17:07 This is one important step in the process of making college accessible to all students, but it’s often not enough. 17:14 I would suggest that after the accommodations notice that the student email the professor and ask for an opportunity to meet. 17:23 This gives the professor and the student an opportunity to talk about the accommodations, about how the student learns best, and it gives the professor an opportunity to understand how they could best support the student’s success. 17:37 Sometimes when I meet with students like this, I also learn better strategies for teaching that are going to be helpful to all of my students. 17:45 At a minimum, it gives me an opportunity to know that individual student in a more personal way. 17:51 Also, when a student comes to my office for support, like I said before, it’s often easier for the student to come back because it’s less intimidating. 18:00 Another time that it’s important to email professors is when a student is going to be absent from class or arrive late or leave early for some reason. 18:09 Communicating by email with the professor in advance demonstrates that the student is committed to their learning. 18:16 And I promise you that professors like this. 18:19 If you don’t already know, every course in college is going to have a syllabus. 18:24 It could be short, but it’s usually pretty long, and it usually looks pretty boring. 18:29 My sense is that students don’t always read the entire document. 18:33 I’m going to tell you that reading the entire syllabus at the beginning of the semester is super valuable. 18:39 The syllabus outlines all of the expectations for the course, for the professor as well as the student. 18:46 Things like attendance policies, dates that the class will or will not meet, directions for assignments and due dates, policies for determining grades. They’re all in that document. 18:59 Reading the syllabus can give the student a good understanding of the professor’s expectations of them and can answer many of the questions that arise for the student. 19:11 There are now so many supports available at college, so many more than when I was a student myself. 19:18 Each school is going to have their own names and their own acronyms, but in general most colleges are going to have academic advisors. 19:29 These are staff members that help students determine what classes they need for their major and to give general information and support about doing well at that particular school. 19:39 They’ll also be able to advise students on the college requirements that are not major specific, just the core requirements for graduation. 19:49 Faculty advisors, those are professors who are expert in subjects and teach as well as provide information and support to students. 19:58 As a faculty advisor, I meet with my students and talk to them about their major courses, their minor courses, their future career goals, career opportunities, internship opportunities. 20:10 Basically anything that a student might be interested in talking about with a faculty member, that’s what the faculty advisor is there for. A tutoring center. 20:19 Tutoring centers help with classes, with assignments, with academic skills. 20:24 Writing centers for help with college-level reading and writing, which is not an uncommon challenge for students who are making the transition to college. 20:33 It is often a pretty big learning curve to get into the process of college writing, and And that’s why the writing center is there. 20:42 Accessibility services, which might also be called the Office of Specialized Services, where students with disabilities apply for accommodations. 20:50 The student should begin the process of registering with that office as soon as possible. 20:55 Once they’re registered, professors don’t get information about the student’s disability, but they do get information about the accommodations that the student is entitled to. 21:05 A counseling center for crisis intervention, individual and group counseling to support students adjustment and referrals for therapy if needed. Residence life. 21:16 Students and staff who provide supervision and support for students who live on campus and help with housing and roommate issues. 21:23 Career services for job search, resume writing, internships, career fairs. Study abroad. 21:31 These are staff that help students connect with other colleges in the United States and abroad for travel programs, semester and year long study away or study abroad programs, librarians to help students find resources and assignments for books, articles, and other sources of information, as well as books and movies and things like that for entertainment purposes. 21:56 Libraries also have lots of space for a group and quiet studying. 22:02 Instructional technology or help desk staff provide help with technology issues. 22:07 They can often provide, and this is something I hope you tell all of your friends, when you are a registered college student, usually the IT help desk gives you access to the expensive software that you would typically pay to put on your laptop or your desktop computer. 22:25 Very often those fees are already included in your tuition. 22:30 So if a student is in need of any software throughout their college experience, I would strongly recommend that they reach out to their IT help desk. 22:39 Sometimes they can even loan out laptops for students who are having trouble with their computers. 22:45 Some colleges even have free laptops available for students who can’t afford one or don’t own one. 22:51 Many colleges now have clothing closets where students can get items of professional clothing for job interviews and internships totally for free. 23:00 Food pantries are also common, providing free packaged and sometimes even fresh food for those who need it. 23:08 Financial aid office, these staff are there to help with information about grants and loans to pay for school. 23:14 Some will have a separate or related scholarships office for information on scholarships that are available. 23:20 One thing that I want you to know is that sometimes scholarship money gets returned because students don’t even apply for scholarships. 23:31 So once a student is enrolled, there may be more opportunities for scholarships. 23:38 And the student should reach out to the Scholarships Office to inquire. 23:45 EOF Office, a staff to provide support to Educational Opportunity Fund eligible students. 23:51 First Generation Student Center and Diversity Centers, So, centers to serve women’s issues or to reach out to gender and sexuality minority students or veteran centers to provide support and information, resources, and community. 24:07 Mutual aid groups. 24:08 For example, I facilitate a non-traditional student mutual aid network for adult students and parents and other non-traditional students. 24:17 Programs for neurodivergent students. 24:19 For example, at my school, we have the ENHANCE program, which is a therapeutic support program for students who are diagnosed on the autism spectrum. 24:28 Health and wellness educators and wellness rooms and even therapy animals. 24:33 Health centers that provide medical care and sometimes even prescription services. 24:38 Schools will likely have EDIC offices or programs meant to support equity, diversity and inclusion on campus with policies, programming and supports for all members of the college community. 24:49 And of course, all schools will have safety departments or sometimes police departments to ensure safety on campus. 24:57 Something that your students might reach out to these departments about include when they have to travel around campus and times when things are less active. 25:05 Often these departments will provide walking escorts at students request. 25:09 On that note, larger campuses will also have parking and transportation departments that can help students figure out things like parking and using on-campus and off-campus bus systems. 25:19 All of this information will be available on the college website. 25:23 I could go on and on about the support services available to college students. 25:29 The thing that I want to highlight here is that all of these programs are there to help and support students. 25:34 But they can only support students if students reach out and express interest. 25:39 Please encourage your student to explore what their school offers and encourage them to reach out. 25:44 You can usually find out about these supports on not only the college website, but also on their social media accounts. 25:52 There are many people who are enthusiastic to connect with a college student, but it’s usually on the student to connect first. 25:59 I promise you, you are not bothering people when you reach out. 26:03 This is why we love working in a college environment because we love to support student success. 26:10 So while college students are hopefully becoming more independent and they might even be living away from home, family is still an important source of social support. 26:20 For some students, they may need to disengage from some work or family or home responsibilities in order to prioritize their studies and just adjust to college life. 26:30 If possible, providing them with the opportunity to disconnect from those responsibilities can be helpful to them. That being said, continuing to connect with family is really important. 26:42 There’s so many ways that you can keep in touch and what works for one student isn’t necessarily going to be the same for another student. 26:51 You can talk, you can text, you can FaceTime, sorry, you can talk on the phone, you can text, you can FaceTime, you can send mail to maintain your support and connection. 27:01 Some students might wanna be in touch a lot and others may not. 27:05 Only you know as a family what’s best for your student, but I do encourage you to try and be available when your student does reach out to connect. 27:14 It can often come at the most inconvenient times, but if your college student doesn’t reach out much, it’s especially important to try to connect when they do reach out. 27:24 It’s important for everyone to remember that they’re growing independence, but they’re not alone. 27:30 Having your support, even if you’re maybe hours away, can still give them the confidence that they need to try new things. 27:37 For example, my teenager appreciates when I’m available to help with bus travel. 27:43 So being able to talk with me on the phone while they’re waiting at the bus stop in a different town or maybe even having having me read the complicated bus schedule on my phone even when I’m in a different state they feel supported and they feel more confident and that’s how they grow even though texting is super convenient and may be the way that your young person’s prefers to be in contact talking on the phone hearing each other’s voices may be important. 28:12 One study I found found that for girls hearing mom’s voice on the phone decreased stress hormones more than texting about the same issue. 28:23 Please also consider the role of older siblings in supporting college students. 28:28 Another study that I found said that especially for first-generation college students the support of older siblings was really important. 28:40 So it might sound funny to talk about connecting with yourself, but as a college student becomes more independent, their relationship with themself might need to evolve. 28:50 They need to develop more ability to solve problems and cope with stress on their own. 28:56 In order to do this, it’s important to take good care of yourself and to be kind to yourself. 29:00 Taking good care of your body by eating well and staying hydrated, getting enough sleep as well as physical activity is important. 29:11 Almost all colleges have gym or fitness centers that students can use at no additional cost. 29:18 Colleges also have dietitians available to support students with healthy and safe eating at school. 29:24 This is particularly important for students who have food allergies, but those dieticians are often available to anyone who reaches out for support. 29:36 When things are difficult, which may be often, it’s important to remember that you’re not alone. 29:42 Many students struggle with the transition to college. There’s not something wrong with you because you struggle. 29:48 If you struggle, you’re If you struggle, it’s important to acknowledge that and to say to yourself, I’m having a hard time. 29:55 This is stressful But it’s important also to not dwell on that. 30:00 You could say to yourself something like I’m having a hard time This is stressful and I can do it. 30:06 I know if I’m around people I’ll feel better So I’m gonna go to the club meeting tonight or I know if I get some exercise. 30:13 I’ll feel better So I’m gonna go to the gym tonight Similarly, new college students usually get worse grades in college than they did in high school. 30:23 College is different. The expectations are different. 30:27 It’s important to not get caught up or stuck on bad grades. 30:31 Remind yourself that this is common and that a lot of people have a hard time adjusting and that it usually works out. 30:37 If you get a bad grade as your beginning college, don’t assume that you shouldn’t be at college. That is not true. 30:44 Remind yourself that your whole life is changing and it takes a while to adjust. 30:48 On that note, parents, please do not be hard on your students for lower grades as they transition. 30:56 They really are doing so much. 30:59 Be kind to your student and students be kind to yourself. 31:04 Messages like, this is a big adjustment and I’m so proud of you, or I’m proud of myself for doing it. 31:10 Those messages can be super helpful. 31:13 Mindful awareness of your feelings can also help. 31:16 For example, I’m nervous because this is the first time I’m doing this on my own. 31:21 It’s a way to be mindful and to support yourself. 31:25 Focus on identifying common humanity. 31:27 So, for example, I’m not alone. 31:29 Many students are nervous to meet new people. 31:32 Remind yourself that you’re worthy and that you respect yourself. 31:35 You might say, nobody’s perfect. I’m doing a good job. 31:38 All of these messages can foster your resilience and support your growth. 31:43 As I mentioned earlier, anxiety and depression are not uncommon at college. 31:48 If a student is struggling to the point that you’re concerned about their safety, or if you have serious concerns about their wellness, please remember the counseling center is a resource, and their website will likely have information about 24-7 emergency services if needed. 32:07 So I feel like we’ve covered a lot, and I hope that you found something helpful. 32:11 In my presentation, I want to wrap up by reminding you that I believe connection is the key to navigating a path to college success. 32:21 Connecting with yourself, connecting with your peers, connecting with faculty and other supports, connecting with family will help you in this major transition. 32:31 Remember that you’re not alone on this journey and that many people are waiting to connect with you. 32:38 I do have a few more suggestions to support college success and this one is about organization. 32:44 I encourage students to be planful about how they will spend their time. There’s a lot more freedom in college and a lot more flexibility. 32:52 While almost all of their time in high school is structured and planned by adults, in college there is very little external structure. 32:59 Outside of class times, college students are pretty much on their own. 33:03 Nobody tells them what time to wake up, to eat, to study, to have fun, or to go to sleep. 33:08 Nobody tells them what to be doing minute to minute, or even make them go to class. 33:14 It’s up to them to decide, and that can be great. 33:17 However, for many students, this is a completely new set of responsibilities, and it can be overwhelming at first. 33:24 To manage this transition well, I encourage students to make their own plans, think in advance about their classes and their other commitments, and then work backward from there to plan wake up times, commute times, meals, time for school work, exercise, time for fun. 33:42 Even plan what time you should go to sleep so you can get enough sleep for tomorrow. 33:47 I encourage students to have a couple of calendars. 33:49 They can be electronic on their phones or where they can keep track of big things like class schedules or major due dates, et cetera. 33:58 But I also encourage people to have daily schedules either on paper or a whiteboard, before you go to sleep at night is a great time to write out tomorrow’s schedule with everything that needs to be done from wake up to breakfast to everything else. 34:17 It may sound funny, but as you build new routines, it’s not uncommon for students to forget to eat because time gets away from them and then you don’t have the fuel you need to perform well and get through your day. 34:27 So, I think it’s important to have a plan for your weeks, sorry, for your days, then your weeks, then your semester, but it’s also important to give yourself some flexibility because sometimes things come up. 34:40 A professor might give out a new assignment or a great social opportunity might arise and we might need to readjust plans. 34:48 Part of the transition to college life is learning how to manage your time and balance commitments. 34:54 Parents, if you haven’t already thought of this, please believe me when I say that this adjustment takes so much time and energy. 35:02 Please notice when your students are making good decisions. 35:05 When they’re learning, when they’re growing, when they’re learning from their mistakes and growing, when they’re managing their time well and they’re growing. 35:12 When you notice it, please tell them that you are so proud of them. 35:15 They really need to hear that. 35:21 My last point that I want to share is that it’s important for the college student to be informed. 35:25 There’s a lot going on at college. Events on campus to experience, college and major course requirements, deadlines to meet, paperwork to submit. 35:36 It’s important for students to use the resources available to them so that they can stay informed. 35:42 The college website has so much information on it. Many of your questions will be answered for you online there, but you just need to find them. 35:51 One thing that you can find on your college website is the catalog and that provides you with information about college-wide requirements, major and minor program requirements. 36:02 You can find deadlines for adding and dropping and withdrawing from classes. 36:07 You can also find information about how to change your major. 36:11 Most schools will also have an online system where you can track your college core and major requirements to help you plan your classes for next semester. 36:21 It can be tricky to learn how to navigate the college’s website, but if you spend time, you can learn so much. 36:28 The college is also going to share a lot of information with students by email on a regular basis, sometimes even daily. 36:35 It can be so much that it’s hard to keep up on everything, but it’s really important for students to read the emails that are sent to them by the college and by their professors. 36:45 There’s also going to be posters and signs around campus, letting students know about important deadlines and important events. 36:53 Parents might wonder how they can keep informed. 36:56 Some colleges will send out parent newsletters, but that’s definitely not always the case. 37:01 If parents would like to keep informed, to keep a pulse on what’s going on in the college community, some colleges have groups on Facebook where parents of students can connect. 37:12 So what I would suggest is that you search on Facebook, parents of, and then the college name, students, and you might find a community of parents of students at that college. 37:24 And that’s a nice way to keep a pulse on the culture of the college without necessarily knowing exactly what’s going on with your student. 37:34 Well, I hope that my presentation has given you some new information and some new things to think about as your student and you continue on the path to college success. 37:44 In closing, I’d like to share two resources that I think are really helpful. 37:47 Harlan Cohen has a presence on Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, and other places, including his own website. 37:55 He gives very relatable, easy to digest advice to college students and their parents. 38:01 I would highly recommend that all parents and students follow him on social media. 38:06 And Grown and Flown is a partnership between two women that give excellent advice to parents of teens in navigating many challenges associated with growing up. 38:16 and I would encourage parents to check them out as well. 38:21 In case you’re interested in book recommendations, I love the book, Never Enough written by Jennifer Wallace. 38:28 It’s a great read for how our achievement culture might be causing harm to our young people and also our relationships with them. 38:37 And for a very positive read on the potentially stressful college search and decision process, I definitely recommend Barnard and Clark’s, the truth about college admissions, a family guide to getting in and staying together. 38:52 Both books were very helpful to me. 38:56 So here are some of the references for the research I started with tonight. 39:01 And now I wonder if you have any questions for me. 39:06 Thank you so, so much, Colleen. 39:09 So yes, we have a couple of questions. 39:12 And for those in the audience, if you have any questions, feel free to submit them under the questions box. 39:20 I believe it’s in the upper right-hand corner of the screen. 39:24 Right now, one question that we have. 39:27 Oh, actually, I’m getting ahead of myself. 39:31 So I wanted to say that we’re going to jump into Q &A. 39:34 First, I’ll ask the submitted questions, and then we’ll switch to the verbal Q &A, which is when I will stop the recording. 39:39 Once again, any other questions that you guys have, feel free to submit them. 39:43 And if you want to hold out to the verbal questions, completely understandable. 39:46 So one question that we have is, were there any mistakes you made in college that you wish new students could learn from? Yes. 39:57 Do we have a couple minutes? That’s a great question. I actually, I do. 40:07 So you know that slide I had with the list of many, many resources available at colleges. 40:15 When when I was in college, I had no idea if any of those of those supports were available. I never connected with anyone outside of class. 40:26 And I turned out alright, so it’s okay. But I did have a challenge with a class that was really overwhelming to me. 40:36 And I knew that there was no way I was going to be able to do well in that class. 40:43 And I was afraid to drop the class because I believed that if I dropped the class I would lose my financial aid. 40:53 And so I was young and uninformed and I didn’t consult with anyone. 40:58 And so I just made a decision, I’m not going to drop the class because I don’t want to financial aid but I can’t keep going to the class because it’s causing me too much stress and so I made a conscious decision to stay in the class even though I knew I would fail the class and that took a toll on my GPA and that failed class was on my transcript forever it’s still there and so the reason why that was a mistake is that I now know that I probably could have withdrawn from that and avoided that toll on my GPA and also the toll on my self-esteem and so had I had the opportunity to go back I would have walked into the financial aid office and said hey can I drop a class and still keep financial aid or I might have walked into my academic advisor and said you know what are my options so that’s really something that I hope you all learn from this is that you don’t have to make all of the decisions on your own. 42:05 You don’t have to figure things out on your own. 42:07 There are literally people all over the college campus that want to help you. 42:12 And I really encourage you to reach out to them. 42:15 I hope that helps. 42:17 Now, definitely, I think that advice is so, so, so important. 42:22 And then I have one more question. 42:26 So I know that participation in class is usually very important in college, but my child is extremely nervous to talk in class. 42:35 Do you have any suggestions for them? 42:40 Absolutely. 42:41 So first of all, they should know that they are not the only one. 42:47 I have been teaching for decades now, and I find that overall students are more nervous to talk in class. 42:59 Of course, not everyone, But I would say there’s a larger proportion of students who are nervous to talk in class than there ever was before. 43:07 And so first of all, remind yourself that you’re not the only one that’s nervous. 43:11 But the other thing that I would encourage the student to do is email the professor and talk to them about it. 43:19 Because the professor’s there to help the student be successful. 43:26 And the professor has done this before. 43:29 the professor can help strategize with the students ways to become more comfortable and I actually have an example of this happening recently a student came to me and said I know you said in your syllabus that participation is really important I’m really nervous and I said well one of the things that we’re going to do is we’re gonna do a lot of small group work how do you feel talking in small groups rather than the whole class setting and the student said oh yeah I’m okay with that and so long story short the students got in a lot of experience of talking in the small group and now is becoming more confident speaking in front of the whole class just because of all of that practice so thankfully this was built into my syllabus that we were planning that actually into my course plan that that we were gonna have a lot of small group discussion, but just my knowing that the student was a little bit more apprehensive than most, that helped me to think strategically about how can I run my classroom in a way to support that student. 44:39 And sometimes it’s me giving the student advice or suggestions, sometimes it’s me making, you know, adjustments to support the the development of confidence in that student. 44:53 So I would definitely say it’s very appropriate to send an email to the professor or to go to the professor’s office hours and say you always want to start off with something nice. 45:06 So I really like your class or I’m really excited about your class and I see in the syllabus that it’s important to participate. 45:14 I’d like participate but I feel nervous. Can you help me with that? 45:19 I am confident that your professors will be open to that and want to work with you because remember we are here because we love to help students grow and learn. 45:30 So if you tell us what you need some extra help with we’re absolutely there to help you. 45:36 So I would say it’s really good to communicate with your professor. 45:41 I will also that counseling centers may be a place for a resource for a student if their nervousness or shyness is a challenge in other settings. 46:01 If social skills, communication, speaking in groups is a pretty general challenge, the social skills groups or communications groups. They may offer things like that as well. 46:17 I hope that helps. 46:22 So right now, before we switch to verbal questions, for current high school seniors, this is a PSA. 46:32 So NJCTS has a youth scholarship program that seniors can apply for and NJCTS would give out a small scholarship they can use for their year of college as well as for trading school. 46:46 More information for that is located on our website at njcts.org. 46:53 Additionally, for those watching the recorded version, thank you so much for attending. 46:56 Please complete the exit survey. 46:58 An archive recording of this webinar will be posted to our website njcts.org under the programs tab. 47:05 The blog is now open and accessible under the archived webinar. 47:08 All questions submitted during the recorded viewing will be posted there. 47:13 Our presenter will be answering all questions posted until Tuesday, November 26th. Any personal information will not be included. 47:19 Our next presentation will be Empowering Parents of Anxious Children Implementing the SPACE Program model presented by Ms. 47:26 Giddy Gordon. It is scheduled for Wednesday, December 18th at 7 p.m. 47:31 Eastern Time with the recording the following day, Thursday, December 19th at 2 p.m. Eastern Time. 47:38 We offer professional Development Certificates for School Professionals and School Nurses that attend the live or recording of the webinar to register for either time, please visit njcts.org slash webinars. 47:51 And with that, I’m going to stop the recording.